The work that we do here in Bristol has a few common themes. One of them is that we are are almost always seeing people who's conscious and unconscious mind are in some sort of conflict. A smoker will have a long string of very rational, logical (conscious) reasons why he shouldn't smoke, and still wants to do it (unconsciously) anyway. A person with a phobia will know (consciously) that its ridiculous that they are scared of something that cannot harm them (unconsciously) but it does not lessen the fear.

Whenever what we think we should feel, and what we actually feel are very different there is a conscious / unconscious conflict. That is why all the postulating and conscious thinking in the world will not help. It is only by "reprogramming" the unconcious mind that real change is made. You can try pulling leaves off of a weed but it is only by digging up the weed that you really get rid of it.